How do they do it?

How do folks do it? How do they present as warm and fuzzy and approachable? I just don't have it. Not in the public presentation arena anyways. One on one, for sure, but I look at my public face and it's mostly quite .... I dunno, not cozy leg warmers and fluffy small animals, or hot chocolate and comfort foods. I seem to present more like the austere mountain mystic you traipse up steep peeks to find only in dire situations when you've exhausted every other soft and fluffy means to fix the issues in your life.

That's probably just how it's going to remain.

But then I guess we have the folks who open doors and welcome people into the fort on a cold wet night, and then we have those standing on the fort wall with craggy faces, rain dripping from the tips of their broken noses, who are just as appreciative of a warm fire and hot soup, but can stand in the cold dark for hours making sure anyone in the fort doesn't have to think about the cold dark too much. Whatever. I like chain maille, and steel blades. What's not to appreciate about the glint of light off a well wrought blade? I do actually have a broken nose as well, the result of a childhood swing mishap.

Ok, I'm just going to do another round of self-talk, letting myself know it's ok to not be approachable.

On other fronts, a few more layers of synthesized realities are smooshing down into one another, the hierarchical forces maintaining them are moving on, more packets of personal responsibility are being handed back to the 'souls' experiencing here as consciousness in form, and pretty soon a whole lot of deferred responsibility will be smacking folks around a bit more as they either surrender and accept their part in it's creation, or continue to reject it and have it shove itself into their fields anyhoo, tossing them about on the waves of its gleeful expression of disregard for their not wanting to own it.

Apparently, perhaps, possibly.

My increasing disaffection for human constructs of societal interaction continues. Not sure what to do about that. I am moving further and further away from participation in any form of human group mind belief/celebration. Take Christmas for instance. Partaking of the 'spirit' of it just isn't going to happen. It's not that I am a Grinch. I just find that the field of thought created around the expression of this Christmas behemoth physically repels me. As in I am repelled from the act of Christmas participation by the make up of my own spinning fields. Christmas is a habit of thought, a construct of beliefs which glance off the surface of my fields like razor wire. See... warm fuzzy expression, not.

So what do you participate in when everything around you starts to look like a thought construct founded on a firmament of synthetic light? The choices begin to reduce until I find myself once again laying hold of the words of Solomon 'there is nothing new under the Sun', and to paraphrase 'eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow you die'. I don't think he was being maudlin at all, just very observant. What more is there, other than to enjoy the sensations of good food and drink, good company, enjoy your physical life, because tomorrow you may be out of it and off somewhere else.

I think he was coming to a realization that the 'doings' of human life are all constructs, without true purpose, just repetitions of behaviours from sun up to sun down. And that once he died from this physical world he would be able to get back to having purpose in his life experience, having been released from the box of this world. That's what this synthetic reality construct has made for souls in form to experience here - purposeless repetition, covered over with the belief that purposeless has purpose. Bit of a shit really.

I like to think that when the synthetic mind gives way to the deconstruction and transmutation in process, life in physical form on this planet and others will get more of a shiny glow to it; and that when the energies we create from our life-weavings are able to go to our own forward motion and not be fed into the batteries of a Cosmic Force with delusions of godhood, that sweet nougat of self purpose will return to the soul-in-form.

In the meantime, I keep recording, keep speaking, keep interacting with the many unseeable who come asking to speak to me, keep doing whatever it is I am doing. Because what else is there to do? I desire to get to the nougat goodness, so I'll keep digging out shit to help fellow travelers get themselves extricated from under the piles of it pumped into this reality.

Thankful I am for the few others I come across who help me to remember what the nougat tastes like.

Love youse all.